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暮光之城4-Breaking Dawn-30

作者:斯蒂芬妮·梅尔 字数:33802 更新:2023-10-09 20:03:26

manifesting so clearly even before the transformation. I can't feel a way through her shield to get a sense  of it at all. Yet she must be raw still—she's only a few months old." The look he gave Edward now was  almost exasperated. "And apparently completely unaware of what she's doing. Totally unconscious.  Ironic. Aro sent me all over the world searching for such anomalies, and you simply stumble across it by  accident and don't even realize what you have." Eleazar shook his head in disbelief.  I frowned. "What are you talking about? How can I be a shield? What does that even mean?" All I  could picture in my head was a ridiculous medieval suit of armor.  Eleazar leaned his head to one side as he examined me. "I suppose we were overly formal about it in the  guard. In truth, categorizing talents is a subjective, haphazard business; every talent is unique, never  exactly the same thing twice. But you, Bella, are fairly easy to classify. Talents that are purely defensive,  that protect some aspect of the bearer, are always called shields. Have you ever tested your abilities?  Blocked anyone besides me and your mate?"  It took me few seconds, despite how quickly my new brain worked, to organize my answer.  "It only works with certain things," I told him. "My head is sort of… private. But it doesn't stop Jasper  from being able to mess with my mood or Alice from seeing my future."  "Purely a mental defense." Eleazar nodded to himself. "Limited, but strong."  "Aro couldn't hear her," Edward interjected. "Though she was human when they met."  Eleazar's eyes widened.  "Jane tried to hurt me, but she couldn't," I said. "Edward thinks Demetri can't find me, and that Alec  can't bother me, either. Is that good?"  Eleazar, still gaping, nodded. "Quite."  "A shield!" Edward said, deep satisfaction saturating his tone. "I never thought of it that way. The only  one I've ever met before was Renata, and what she did was so different."  Generatedby ABC Amber LIT Converter, m/ml  Eleazar had recovered slightly. "Yes, no talent ever manifests in precisely the same way, because no one  ever thinks in exactly the same way."  "Who's Renata? What does she do?" I asked. Renesmee was interested, too, leaning away from  Carmen so that she could see around Kate.  "Renata is Aro's personal bodyguard," Eleazar told me. "A very practical kind of shield, and a very  strong one."  I vaguely remembered a small crowd of vampires hovering close to Aro in his macabre tower, some  male, some female. I couldn't remember the women's faces in the uncomfortable, terrifying memory. One  must have been Renata.  "I wonder…," Eleazar mused. "You see, Renata is a powerful shield against a physical attack. If  someone approaches her—or Aro, as she is always close beside him in a hostile situation—they find  themselves… diverted.  There's a force around her that repels, though it's almost unnoticeable. You simply find yourself going a  different direction than you planned, with a confused memory as to why you wanted to go that other way  in the first place. She can project her shield several meters out from herself. She also protects Caius and  Marcus, too, when they have a need, but Aro is her priority.  "What she does isn't actually physical, though. Like the vast majority of our gifts, it takes place inside the  mind. If she tried to keep you back, I wonder who would win?" He shook his head. "I've never heard of  Aro's or Jane's gifts being thwarted."  "Momma, you're special," Renesmee told me without any surprise, like she was commenting on the color  of my clothes.  I felt disoriented. Didn't I already know my gift? I had my super-self-control that had allowed me to skip  right over the horrifying newborn year. Vampires only had one extra ability at most, right?  Or had Edward been correct in the beginning? Before Carlisle had suggested that my self-control could  be something beyond the natural, Edward had thought my restraint was just a product of good  preparation— focus and attitude,he'd declared.  Which one had been right? Was there more I could do? A name and a category for what I was?  "Can you project?" Kate asked interestedly.  "Project?" I asked.  "Push it out from yourself," Kate explained. "Shield someone besides yourself."  "I don't know. I've never tried. I didn't know I should do that."  "Oh, you might not be able to," Kate said quickly. "Heavens knows I've been working on it for centuries  and the best I can do is run a current over my skin."  I stared at her, mystified.  Generatedby ABC Amber LIT Converter, m/ml  "Kate's got an offensive skill," Edward said. "Sort of like Jane."  I flinched away from Kate automatically, and she laughed.  "I'm not sadistic about it," she assured me. "It's just something that comes in handy during a fight."  Kate's words were sinking in, beginning to make connections in my mind. Shield someone besides  yourself she'd said. As if there were some way for me to include another person in my strange, quirky  silent head.  I remembered Edward cringing on the ancient stones of the Volturi castle turret. Though this was a  human memory, it was sharper, more painful than most of the others—like it had been branded into the  tissues of my brain.  What if I could stop that from happening ever again? What if I could protect him? Protect Renesmee?  What if there was even the faintest glimmer of a possibility that I could shield them, too?  "You have to teach me what to do!" I insisted, unthinkingly grabbing Kate's arm. "You have to show me  how!"  Kate winced at my grip. "Maybe—if you stop trying to crush my radius."  "Oops! Sorry!"  "You're shielding, all right," Kate said. "That move should have about shocked your arm off. You didn't  feel  anything just now?"  "That wasn't really necessary, Kate. She didn't mean any harm," Edward muttered under his breath.  Neither of us paid attention to him.  "No, I didn't feel anything. Were you doing your electric current thing?"  "I was. Hmm. I've never met anyone who couldn't feel it, immortal or otherwise."  "You said you project it? On your skin?"  Kate nodded. "It used to be just in my palms. Kind of like Aro."  "Or Renesmee," Edward interjected.  "But after a lot of practice, I can radiate the current all over my body. It's a good defense. Anyone who  tries to touch me drops like a human that's been Tasered. It only downs him for a second, but that's long  enough."  I was only half-listening to Kate, my thoughts racing around the idea that I might be able to protect my  little family if I could just learn fast enough. I wished fervently that I might be good at this projecting thing,  too, like I was somehow mysteriously good at all the other aspects of being a vampire. My human life  had not prepared me for things that came naturally, and I couldn't make myself trust this aptitude to last.  Generatedby ABC Amber LIT Converter, m/ml  It felt like I had never wanted anything so badly before this; to be able to protect what I loved.  Because I was so preoccupied, I didn't notice the silent exchange going on between Edward and Eleazar  until it became a spoken conversation.  "Can you think of even one exception, though?" Edward asked.  I looked over to make sense of his comment and realized that everyone else was already staring at the  two men. They were leaning toward each other intently, Edward's expression tight with suspicion,  Eleazar's unhappy and reluctant.  "I don't want to think of them that way," Eleazar said through his teeth. I was surprised at the sudden  change in the atmosphere.  "If you're right—," Eleazar began again.  Edward cut him off. "The thought was yours, not mine."  "If I'm right… I can't even grasp what that would mean. It would change everything about the world  we've created. It would change the meaning of my life. What I have been a part of."  "Your intentions were always the best, Eleazar."  "Would that even matter? What have I done? How many lives …"  Tanya put her hand on Eleazar's shoulder in a comforting gesture. "What did we miss, my friend? I want  to know so that I can argue with these thoughts. You've never done anything worth castigating yourself  this way."  "Oh, haven't I?" Eleazar muttered. Then he shrugged out from under her hand and began his pacing  again, faster even than before.  Tanya watched him for half a second and then focused on Edward. "Explain."  Edward nodded, his tense eyes following Eleazar as he spoke. "He was trying to understand why so  many of  the Volturi would come to punish us. It's not the way they do things. Certainly, we are the biggest mature  coven they've dealt with, but in the past other covens have joined to protect themselves, and they never  presented much of a challenge despite their numbers. We are more closely bonded, and that's a factor,  but not a huge one.  "He was remembering other times that covens have been punished, for one thing or the other, and a  pattern occurred to him. It was a pattern that the rest of the guard would never have noticed, since  Eleazar was the one passing the pertinent intelligence privately to Aro. A pattern that only repeated every  other century or so."  "What was this pattern?" Carmen asked, watching Eleazar as Edward was.  "Aro does not often personally attend a punishing expedition," Edward said. "But in the past, when Aro  Generatedby ABC Amber LIT Converter, m/ml  wanted something in particular, it was never long before evidence turned up proving that this coven or  that coven had committed some unpardonable crime. The ancients would decide to go along to watch the  guard administer justice. And then, once the coven was all but destroyed, Aro would grant a pardon to  one member whose thoughts, he would claim, were particularly repentant. Always, it would turn out that  this vampire had the gift Aro had admired. Always, this person was given a place with the guard. The  gifted vampire was won over quickly, always so grateful for the honor. There were no exceptions."  "It must be a heady thing to be chosen," Kate suggested.  "Ha!" Eleazar snarled, still in motion.  "There is one among the guard," Edward said, explaining Eleazar's angry reaction. "Her name is Chelsea.  She has influence over the emotional ties between people. She can both loosen and secure these ties. She  could make someone feel bonded to the Volturi, to want to belong, to want to please them___"  Eleazar came to an abrupt halt. "We all understood why Chelsea was important. In a fight, if we could  separate allegiances between allied covens, we could defeat them that much more easily. If we could  distance the innocent members of a coven emotionally from the guilty, justice could be done without  unnecessary brutality—the guilty could be punished without interference, and the innocent could be  spared. Otherwise, it was impossible to keep the coven from fighting as a whole. So Chelsea would  break the ties that bound them together. It seemed a great kindness to me, evidence of Aro's mercy. I  did suspect that Chelsea kept our own band more tightly knit, but that, too, was a good thing. It made us  more effective. It helped us coexist more easily."  This clarified old memories for me. It had not made sense to me before how the guard obeyed their  masters so gladly, with almost lover-like devotion.  "How strong is her gift?" Tanya asked with an edge to her voice. Her gaze quickly touched on each  member of her family.  Eleazar shrugged. "I was able to leave with Carmen." And then he shook his head. "But anything weaker  than the bond between partners is in danger. In a normal coven, at least. Those are weaker bonds than  those in our family, though. Abstaining from human blood makes us more civilized—lets us form true  bonds of love. I doubt she could turn our allegiances, Tanya."  Tanya nodded, seeming reassured, while Eleazar continued with his analysis.  "I could only think that the reason Aro had decided to come himself, to bring so many with him, is  because his goal is not punishment but acquisition," Eleazar said. "He needs to be there to control the  situation. But he needs the entire guard for protection from such a large, gifted coven. On the other hand,  that leaves the other ancients unprotected in Volterra. Too risky—someone might try to take advantage.  So they all come together. How else could he be sure to preserve the gifts that he wants? He must want  them very badly," Eleazar mused.  Edward's voice was low as a breath. "From what I saw of his thoughts last spring, Aro's never wanted  anything more than he wants Alice."  I felt my mouth fall open, remembering the nightmarish pictures I had imagined long ago: Edward and  Alice in black cloaks with bloodred eyes, their faces cold and remote as they stood close as shadows,  Aro's hands on theirs… Had Alice seen this more recently? Had she seen Chelsea trying to strip away  her love for us, to bind her to Aro and Caius and Marcus?  Generatedby ABC Amber LIT Converter, m/ml  "Is that why Alice left?" I asked, my voice breaking on her name.  Edward put his hand against my cheek. "I think it must be. To keep Aro from gaining the thing he wants  most of all. To keep her power out of his hands."  I heard Tanya and Kate murmuring in disturbed voices and remembered that they hadn't known about  Alice.  "He wants you, too," I whispered.  Edward shrugged, his face suddenly a little too composed. "Not nearly as much. I can't really give him  anything more than he already has. And of course that's dependent on his finding a way to force me to do  his will. He knows me, and he knows how unlikely that is." He raised one eyebrow sardonically.  Eleazar frowned at Edward's nonchalance. "He also knows your weaknesses," Eleazar pointed out, and  then he looked at me.  "It's nothing we need to discuss now," Edward said quickly.  Eleazar ignored the hint and continued. "He probably wants your mate, too, regardless. He must have  been intrigued by a talent that could defy him in its human incarnation."  Edward was uncomfortable with this topic. I didn't like it, either. If Aro wanted me to do something  —anything—all he had to do was threaten Edward and I would comply. And vice versa.  Was death the lesser concern? Was it really capture we should fear?  Edward changed the subject. "I think the Volturi were waiting for this—for some pretext. They couldn't  know what form their excuse would come in, but the plan was already in place for when it did come.  That's why Alice saw their decision before Irina triggered it. The decision was already made, just waiting  for the pretense of a justification."  "If the Volturi are abusing the trust all immortals have placed in them…," Carmen murmured.  "Does it matter?" Eleazar asked. "Who would believe it? And even if others could be convinced that the  Volturi are exploiting their power, how would it make any difference? No one can stand against them."  "Though some of us are apparently insane enough to try," Kate muttered.  Edward shook his head. "You're only here to witness, Kate. Whatever Aro's goal, I don't think he's  ready to  tarnish the Volturi's reputation for it. If we can take away his argument against us, he'll be forced to leave  us in peace."  "Of course," Tanya murmured.  No one looked convinced. For a few long minutes, nobody said anything.  Then Iheard the sound of tires turning off the highway pavement onto the Cullens' dirt drive.  Generatedby ABC Amber LIT Converter, m/ml  "Oh crap, Charlie," I muttered. "Maybe the Denalis could hang out upstairs until—"  "No," Edward said in a distant voice. His eyes were far away, staring blankly at the door. "It's not your  father." His gaze focused on me. "Alice sent Peter and Charlotte, afterall. Time to get ready for the next  round."  32. COMPANY  The Cullens' enormous house was more crowded with guests than anyone would assume could possibly  be comfortable. It only worked out because none of the visitors slept. Mealtimes were dicey, though.  Our company cooperated as best they could. They gave Forks and La Push a wide berth, only hunting  out of state; Edward was a gracious host, lending out his cars as needed without so much as a wince.  The compromise made me very uncomfortable, though I tried to tell myself that they'd all be hunting  somewhere in the world, regardless.  Jacob was even more upset. The werewolves existed to prevent the loss of human life, and here was  rampant murder being condoned barely outside the packs' borders. But under these circumstances, with  Renesmee in acute danger, he kept his mouth shut and glared at the floor rather than the vampires.  I was amazed at the easy acceptance the visiting vampires had for Jacob; the problems Edward had  anticipated had never materialized. Jacob seemed more or less invisible to them, not quite a person, but  also not food, either. They treated him the way people who are not animal-lovers treat the pets of their  friends.  Leah, Seth, Quil, and Embry were assigned to run with Sam for now, and Jacob would have happily  joined them, except that he couldn't stand to be away from Renesmee, and Renesmee was busy  fascinating the strange collection of Carlisle's friends.  We'd replayed the scene of Renesmee's introduction to the Denali coven a half dozen times. First for  Peter and Charlotte, whom Alice and Jasper had sent our way without giving them any explanation at all;  like most people who knew Alice, they trusted her instructions despite the lack of information. Alice had  told them nothing about which direction she and Jasper were heading. She'd made no promise to ever  see them again in the future.  Neither Peter nor Charlotte had ever seen an immortal child. Though they knew the rule, their negative  reaction was not as powerful as the Denali vampires' had been at first. Curiosity had driven them to allow  Renesmee's "explanation." And that was it. Now they were as committed to witnessing as Tanya's family.  Carlisle had sent friends from Ireland and Egypt.  The Irish clan arrived first, and they were surprisingly easy to convince. Siobhan—a woman of immense  presence whose huge body was both beautiful and mesmerizing as it moved in smooth undulations—was  the leader, but she and her hard-faced mate, Liam, were long used to trusting the judgment of their  newest coven member. Little Maggie, with her bouncy red curls, was not physically imposing like the  other two, but she had a gift for knowing when she was being lied to, and her verdicts were never  contested. Maggie declared that Edward spoke the truth, and so Siobhan and Liam accepted our story  absolutely before even touching Renesmee.  Amun and the other Egyptian vampires were another story. Even after two younger members of his  coven, Benjamin and Tia, had been convinced by Renesmee's explanation, Amun refused to touch her  Generatedby ABC Amber LIT Converter, m/ml  and ordered his coven to leave. Benjamin—an oddly cheerful vampire who looked barely older than a  boy and seemed both utterly confident and utterly careless at the same time—persuaded Amun to stay  with a few subtle threats about disbanding their alliance. Amun stayed, but continued to refuse to touch  Renesmee, and would not allow his mate, Kebi, to touch her, either. It seemed an unlikely  grouping—though the Egyptians all looked so alike, with their midnight hair and olive-toned pallor, that  they easily could have passed for a biological family. Amun was the senior member and the outspoken  leader. Kebi never strayed farther away from Amun than his shadow, and I never heard her speak a  single word. Tia, Benjamin's mate, was a quiet woman as well, though when she did speak there was  great insight and gravity to everything she said. Still, it was Benjamin whom they all seemed to revolve  around, as if he had some invisible magnetism the others depended upon for their balance. I saw Eleazar  staring at the boy with wide eyes and assumed Benjamin had a talent that drew the others to him.  "It's not that," Edward told me when we were alone that night. "His gift is so singular that Amun is  terrified of losing him. Much like we had planned to keep Renesmee from Aro's knowledge"—he  sighed—"Amun has been keeping Benjamin from Aro's attention. Amun created Benjamin, knowing he  would be special."  "What can he do?"  "Something Eleazar's never seen before. Something I've never heard of. Something that even your shield  would do nothing against." He grinned his crooked smile at me. "He can actually influence the elements  —earth, wind, water, and fire. True physical manipulation, no illusion of the mind. Benjamin's still  experimenting with it, and Amun tries to mold him into a weapon. But you see how independent  Benjamin is. He won't be used."  "You like him," I surmised from the tone of his voice.  "He has a very clear sense of right and wrong. I like his attitude."  Amun's attitude was something else, and he and Kebi kept to themselves, though Benjamin and Tia were  well on their way to being fast friends with both the Denali and the Irish covens. We hoped that Carlisle's  return would ease the remaining tension with Amun.  Emmett and Rose sent individuals—any nomad friends of Carlisle's that they could track down.  Garrett came first—a tall, rangy vampire with eager ruby eyes and long sandy hair he kept tied back  with a leather thong—and it was apparent immediately that he was an adventurer. I imagined that we  could have presented  him with any challenge and he would have accepted, just to test himself. He fell in quickly with the Denali  sisters, asking endless questions about their unusual lifestyle. I wondered if vegetarianism was another  challenge he would try, just to see if he could do it.  Mary and Randall also came—friends already, though they did not travel together. They listened to  Renesmee's story and stayed to witness like the others. Like the Denalis, they considered what they  would do if the Volturi did not pause for explanations. All three of the nomads toyed with the idea of  standing with us.  Of course, Jacob got more surly with each new addition. He kept his distance when he could, and when  he couldn't he grumbled to Renesmee that someone was going to have to provide an index if anyone  expected him to keep all the new bloodsuckers1names straight.*  Generatedby ABC Amber LIT Converter, m/ml  Carlisle and Esme returned a week after they had gone, Emmett and Rosalie just a few days later, and  all of us felt better when they were home. Carlisle brought one more friend home with him, though friend  might have been the wrong term. Alistair was a misanthropic English vampire who counted Carlisle as his  closest acquaintance, though he could hardly stand a visit more than once a century. Alistair very much  preferred to wander alone, and Carlisle had called in a lot of favors to get him here. He shunned all  company, and it was clear he didn't have any admirers in the gathered covens.  The brooding dark-haired vampire took Carlisle at his word about Renesmee's origins, refusing, like  Amun, to touch her. Edward told Carlisle, Esme, and me that Alistair was afraid to be here, but more  afraid of not knowing the outcome. He was deeply suspicious of all authority, and therefore naturally  suspicious of the Volturi. What was happening now seemed to confirm all his fears.  "Of course, now they'll know i was here," we heard him grumble to himself in the attic—his preferred  spot to sulk. "No way to keep it from Aro at this point. Centuries on the run, that's what this will mean.  Everyone Carlisle's talked to in the last decade will be on their list. I can't believe I got myself sucked into  this mess. What a fine way to treat your friends."  But if he was right about having to run from the Volturi, at least he had more hope of doing that than the  rest of us. Alistair was a tracker, though not nearly as precise and efficient as Demetri. Alistair just felt an  elusive pull toward whatever he was seeking. But that pull would be enough to tell him which direction to  run—the opposite direction from Demetri.  And then another pair of unexpected friends arrived—unexpected, because neither Carlisle nor Rosalie  had been able to contact the Amazons.  "Carlisle," the taller of the two very tall feline women greeted him when they arrived. Both of them  seemed as if they'd been stretched—long arms and legs, long fingers, long black braids, and long faces  with long noses. They wore nothing but animal skins—hide vests and tight-fitting pants that laced on the  sides with leather ties. It wasn't just their eccentric clothes that made them seem wild but everything about  them, from their restless crimson eyes to their sudden, darting movements. I'd never met any vampires  less civilized.  But Alice had sent them, and that was interesting news, to put it mildly. Why was Alice in South  America? Just  because she'd seen that no one else would be able to get in touch with the Amazons?  "Zafrina and Senna! But Where's Kachiri?" Carlisle asked. Tve never seen you three apart."  "Alice told us we needed to separate," Zafrina answered in the rough, deep voice that matched her wild  appearance. "It's uncomfortable to be away from each other, but Alice assured us that you needed us  here, while she very much needed Kachiri somewhere else. That's all she would tell us, except that there  was a great hurry… ?" Zafrina's statement trailed off into a question, and—with the tremor of nerves that  never went away no matter how often I did this—I brought Renesmee out to meet them.  Despite their fierce appearance, they listened very calmly to our story, and then allowed Renesmee to  prove the point. They were every bit as taken with Renesmee as any of the other vampires, but I couldn't  help worrying as I watched their swift, jerky movements so close beside her. Senna was always near  Zafrina, never speaking, but it wasn't the same as Amun and Kebi. Kebi's manner seemed obedient;  Senna and Zafrina were more like two limbs of one organism—Zafrina just happened to be the  Generatedby ABC Amber LIT Converter, m/ml  mouthpiece.  The news about Alice was oddly comforting. Clearly, she was on some obscure mission of her own as  she avoided whatever Aro had planned for her.  Edward was thrilled to have the Amazons with us, because Zafrina was enormously talented; her gift  could make a very dangerous offensive weapon. Not that Edward was asking for Zafrina to side with us  in the battle, but if the Volturi did not pause when they saw our witnesses, perhaps they would pause for  a different kind of scene.  "It's a very straightforward illusion," Edward explained when it turned out that I couldn't see anything, as  usual. Zafrina was intrigued and amused by my immunity—something she'd never encountered  before—and she hovered restlessly while Edward described what I was missing. Edward's eyes  unfocused slightly as he continued. "She can make most people see whatever she wants them to  see—see that, and nothing else. For example, right now I would appear to be alone in the middle of a  rain forest. It's so clear I might possibly believe it, except for the fact that I can still feel you in my arms."  Zafrina's lips twitched into her hard version of a smile. A second later, Edward's eyes focused again, and  he grinned back.  "Impressive," he said.  Renesmee was fascinated with the conversation, and she reached out fearlessly toward Zafrina.  "Can I see?" she asked.  "What would you like to see?" Zafrina asked.  "What you showed Daddy."  Zafrina nodded, and I watched anxiously as Renesmee's eyes stared blankly into space. A second later,  Renesmee's dazzling smile lit up her face.  "More," she commanded.  After that, it was hard to keep Renesmee away from Zafrina and her pretty pictures. I worried,  because I was quite sure that Zafrina was able to create images that were not pretty at all. But through  Renesmee's thoughts I  could see Zafrina's visions for myself—they were as clear as any of Renesmee's own memories, like they  were real—and thus judge for myself whether they were appropriate or not.  Though I didn't give her up easily, I had to admit it was a good thing Zafrina was keeping Renesmee  entertained. I needed my hands. I had so much to learn, both physically and mentally, and the time was  so short.  My first attempt at learning to fight did not go well.  Edward had me pinned in about two seconds. But instead of letting me wrestle my way free—which I  absolutely could have—he'd leaped up and away from me. I knew immediately that something was  wrong; he was still as stone, staring across the meadow we were practicing in.  Generatedby ABC Amber LIT Converter, m/ml  Tm sorry, Bella," he said.  "No, I'm fine," I said. "Let's go again."  "I can't."  "What do you mean, you can't? We just started."  He didn't answer.  "Look, I know I'm no good at this, but I can't get better if you don't help me."  He said nothing. Playfully, I sprang at him. He made no defense at all, and we both fell to the ground. He  was motionless as I pressed my lips to his jugular.  "I win," I announced.  His eyes narrowed, but he said nothing.  "Edward? What's wrong? Why won't you teach me?"  A full minute passed before he spoke again.  "I just can't… bear it. Emmett and Rosalie know as much as I do. Tanya and Eleazar probably know  more. Ask someone else."  "That's not fair! You're good at this. You helped Jasper before—you fought with him and all the others,  too. Why not me? What did I do wrong?"  He sighed, exasperated. His eyes were dark, barely any gold to lighten the black.  "Looking at you that way, analyzing you as a target. Seeing all the ways I can kill you ." He flinched. "It  just makes it too real for me. We don't have so much time that it will really make a difference who your  teacher is. Anyone can teach you the fundamentals."  I scowled.  He touched my pouting lower lip and smiled. "Besides, it's unnecessary. The Volturi will stop. They will  be made to understand."  "But if they don't! I need to learn this."  "Find another teacher."  That was not our last conversation on the subject, but I never swayed him an inch from his decision.  Emmett was more than willing to help, though his teaching felt to me a lot like revenge for all the lost  arm-wrestling matches. If I could still bruise, I would have been purple from head to toe. Rose, Tanya,  and Eleazar all were patient and supportive. Their lessons reminded me of Jasper's fighting instructions to  Generatedby ABC Amber LIT Converter, m/ml  the others last June, though those memories were fuzzy and indistinct. Some of the visitors found my  education entertaining, and some even offered assistance. The nomad Garrett took a few turns—he was  a surprisingly good teacher; he interacted so easily with others in general that I wondered how he'd never  found a coven. I even fought once with Zafrina while Renesmee watched from Jacob's arms. I learned  several tricks, but I never asked for her help again. In truth, though I liked Zafrina very much and I knew  she wouldn't really hurt me, the wild woman scared me to death.  I learned many things from my teachers, but I had the sense that my knowledge was still impossibly  basic. I had no idea how many seconds I would last against Alec and Jane. I only prayed that it would be  long enough to help.  Every minute of the day that I wasn't with Renesmee or learning to fight, I was in the backyard working  with Kate, trying to push my internal shield outside of my own brain to protect someone else. Edward  encouraged me in this training. I knew he hoped I would find a way of contributing that satisfied me while

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